just_harry in nocturne_alley: Harry Potter's Journal Entry For Professor Snape.

Harry Potter's Journal Entry For Professor Snape.
Today I had breakfast, which was eggs and bacon, and I ate all of it. And I didn't take too much, and I didn't spill anything, and I didn't reach over anyone to get the salt, so I don't think you need to give Colin any detentions for that. Then I went to Potions, which you saw, and you partnered me with Crabbe, and we still managed to make our Bulbutinous Potion without any accidents, and we even got done before alot of the class, so I don't think that you need to give any detentions for that, either. And then I went to Defence Against the Dark Arts, and we had a pop quiz on temporary binding spells, and I managed to cast all of them but the Aeripetrificus spell right, and only Hermione and Parvati got that one right, so I don't think that you need to give any detentions for that. Then we had Herbology, and Neville and I were able to sing our Snappish Dragon to sleep and clean its teeth, and we didn't get bit once, and I answered two of Professor Sprout's questions correctly. So I think I'm in the clear there, too. On the way out of class, I did run into Ernie and drop my books on my foot, so you might want to do something about that. Maybe you could make my owl scrub dishes tomorrow morning after breakfast. After lunch I had Divination and we did tarot readings and it turns out that I'm going to fall out of the Gryffindor Tower window next Tuesday and get gnawed to death by garden gnomes. I figure that will probably make you just thrilled, so I don't think you have to punish anyone for that. But if you do, you should definitely do it by Monday night, or I might not hear about it in time to feel bad about it. After that I went to Charms, and even though Professor Flitwick said that my handwriting was lamentable (I think that's what he said) I did get my quill to walk over to the ink well and fill itself and take notes on its own. And I can read them, even if Professor Flitwick can't, and he gave me almost full points. So probably no detentions there. After that, Ron and Ginny and Soblessa and I played lots of rounds of Monster Eight Handed Exploding Snap before dinner. I won three rounds and lost about 12. Soblessa won six. Then we went down to dinner, and I ate all of my roast and potatoes and carrots and didn't spill anything again. Then some of the team and I went out to have a few scrimmages. And I didn't catch the Snitch the first time, and the second and third times I caught it after about a half an hour, so it wasn't too fast. So you don't need to punish anyone for that, either. Then I came back in and did my assignments. So are you happy now?

I hate this assignment. I really hate it. I don't think anyone is interested in reading what I do every day. I really don't want to write about it, so I guess I just don't see the point. But Snape's been in a foul mood ever since he made a drunken fool of himself at Three Broomsticks, and so of course he has to take it out on Ginny and Dean. He did look really hysterical, though, swinging about like a windmill or something. Everyone was laughing at him, even Malfoy. I mean, Sirius totally kicked him to the kerb. No wonder he's so mad.

But Hogsmeade was alot of fun, all up until Ginny got hit on the head. That was just scary. The teachers were all acting like lunatics. Snape was just smashed, and Sirius can really fight! Madam Hooch can, too. She has a really nasty swing. She knocked this fat old wizard into a table and the table split right in half. I don't even know if she meant to! And Professor Sinistra was throwing mugs and silverware at everyone, and she had her robes all hiked up and she has completely hairy legs. Everyone was hiding under tables so they wouldn't get hit by anything, so we both had a perfect view of her hairy knees. And she's so pretty and neat all the time, so it was really funny. I don't think I've ever laughed so much in my life - we just couldn't stop.

But then Ginny got hit, and that was really frightening, because she was so still that I almost thought she might be dead, and all the teachers but Professor Lupin were all crazy, and Professor Lupin caught on fire so he couldn't help, so it was a huge relief when Professor Dumbledore showed up right then. They put is all in carriages and they sent Snape to jail, which is funny now, but I didn't even really notice then because we were so scared for Ginny. Professor Dumbledore and Madame Pomfrey took Ginny back to school by themselves, so Soblessa rode with us in the carriage. She cried the whole way back.

Ginny seems okay now, but she's still got a bruise, and I think she still looks a little pale. And she's still upset about that dragon Ron gave her. I'm going to have to find a way to make Malfoy give it back.

sinistra @ 2002-07-05 03:24 am UTC

Mr. Potter! Perhaps if you'd taken the care to show some of your infamous nobility, you would have had better things to do than "scope out" my legs. Hiding under a table, really. I will have you know that there is no need for me to bow down to the male oppression.

I also see you need to be corrected. I was not throwing mugs and silverware into the fray. I was merely tossing them aside as I searched for my cloak. It is not my fault they happened to hit Professor Black. Surely this is none of your business, Mr. Potter.

While I thank you for your obvious display of sucking up, that will be seven points from Gryffindor. Next time, you can feel free to keep your sophomoric comments to yourself. Just as I do not mention the lice that are surely crawling around your head.

potions_master @ 2002-07-05 10:02 am UTC

Such vehemence, Mr. Potter.

Whether you hate this assignment or not. Whether you see the point or not. Everyone has to update their journal. Even your ever so revered godfather must keep up with his. Why should you be any different? Why should the famous Harry Potter do his homework?

You are missing the point. Your marks are beyond abysmal and you rely too greatly on your housemates for your assignments, namely the ever-savvy Miss Granger. As much as it pains me to say this, Potter, do remember that you do tend to tangle with the Dark One every year, it seems. While you do not wish for this, it is a reality you have to deal with. For your own self-preservation, you must learn self-reliance. You must do better.

You have those that are willing to indulge when you break a few rules, and in my opinion, they really aren't doing you any favors. Where discipline from any authority figure has failed, peer pressure may work to improve your performance. You can change this Potter - if you deign to descend from your throne on Mount Olympus and actually carry your own weight.

So, for old time's sake, ten points from Gryffindor for your appalling lack of respect.

-Professor Snape

just_harry @ 2002-07-05 10:57 pm UTC

I'm sorry, Sir. I didn't mean to show any lack of respect. I was only trying to make your job easier. I just didn't want you worrying that you had missed a chance to make my friends miserable.

Sincerely,

Harry Potter