pennyclearwater: Flotsam and jetsam.

Flotsam and jetsam.
Oh, god, if there are days that I never, ever want to have to relive, these past few days would be they. Ministry's mostly closed, at least the non-essential offices, anyway, and thank god because I know I couldn't have gone. Percy couldn't have gone. Arthur-- well, he's in, but I can't imagine that he could do any work today, even if his office were open. No one here is worth much of anything right now and I don't know how we ever will be again.

Morton chatted with us from London. He says the emergency mediwizards have been dispatched, and the restructumaguses as well. I don't know when they'll let us go ourselves. I know that they think we'll only get in the way, that it's confusing and chaotic enough as it is-- I understand that-- but how long can they expect us to sit here like this? How can they think that these half-reports and rumours and lists are enough? I think that they can't possibly know what it's like, they can't possibly. I don't even know what it's like, honestly, what it has to be like to be Molly and Arthur right now. What it was like for them to wait for that list. I only know that I read it myself, over and over and over, before it finally sunk in that Ron and Ginny were safe. I told Molly that everyone was fine, that no one was missing, and I thought she was going to cry, that all of us were, but now we've had a chance to read that list again, and, oh god, everyone who is missing. Professor Flitwick. Marisol's little brother. Ron's best friend. Ginny's. All those little Hufflepuff children. No one knows where they are, and it's been days. And I want to scream, I want to hit someone, I want to lift those stones myself, do something, because anything, anything is better than sitting here refreshing this screen and watching that list.

I spent half the weekend trying to reach Mum in Cambridge on the telephone. I just needed to hear her voice, but even when I got through to her, I just don't feel like she heard me. I want my Mum and Dad here, and I want them here now. There's room, Molly said it was fine, I asked, but they still, still, still act like-- not like I'm lying to them, but like these are just fairy stories I've made up. That if it isn't in the Times, then it didn't happen, and I don't know if I have ever felt so cut off from the world where I grew up.

Morton just popped in again, and I almost wish he hadn't. He told me some of the rumours, because there's always rumours, and now Professor McGonagall is calling it an attack. An attack on what? Who did it? Who thinks they have the right to do something like that? Why won't anyone give us any real information? I hate this speculation! I hate imagining and wondering and worrying. If you don't have any real information for us, then god damn it, WHY ARE YOU SAYING ANYTHING AT ALL? Please, god, why won't this be over?

turpinol @ 2003-06-23 08:42 pm UTC

Hi, Penelope. I'm Lisa, I was a few years behind you in Ravenclaw when you were at Hogwarts. I'm in the same year as Ron Weasley. I don't really understand, either. No one will tell us anything for sure, and it rather feels as though they don't think we're mature enough to handle it or something. A lot of the missing people, though, were just hiding, so that's a good thing.

pennyclearwater @ 2003-06-23 09:13 pm UTC

I remember you, Lisa-- you were the one who I used to have to ask to turn your Moke the Wet Dugbog albums down after curfew, weren't you?

I don't know. I imagine that they're just as confused as everyone else. I'm certain that they'll tell us as soon as they know anything. It's just maddening, trying to sort the what ifs from the couldn't possiblys from the truth. Mostly, what it is, is that I have never been good at waiting patiently. I need to know now, and these rumours just make waiting that much worse.

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turpinol @ 2003-06-23 10:19 pm UTC

Er. Moke the Wet Dugbog certainly couldn't have been me.

I reckon someone must have seen something. Most of us were in lessons in entirely different parts of the castle, but surely someone had to be there. If they were looking for Death Eaters like Hermione Granger said, someone saw something to tell them to look for them.

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wehaveseven @ 2003-06-23 09:29 pm UTC

Nobody's doing anything here! Why aren't they doing anything? Everyone is just standing around and talking about it like it was news ten years ago and I want my kids, Penelope, that's all right now

pennyclearwater @ 2003-06-23 09:34 pm UTC

I talked to Ron. He and Ginny are both safe. Are they going to let you go out there? Morton said they likely wouldn't; no one who isn't an engineer or a mediwizard will be allowed anywhere near Hogwarts until it's secured, he says, but that could take days more!

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wehaveseven @ 2003-06-23 09:58 pm UTC

Morton's a bloody fool who stands around and drinks coffee, of course that's a solid biased opinion right now but Penelope, what else can I do? We won't be out there for a few days but I'm going a tad loco - I'll be home for a bit in a tic, talk to you there

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knight_to_h3 @ 2003-06-24 02:41 am UTC

DAD!! Dad? Are you alright there?? It's Ron! And Ginny's here! We're okay, are you??

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Current mood:	Loose ends.
Current music:	Nothing.