| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 16:38:00 |
| Current mood: | enraged |
All I was trying to do was offer Weasley a friendly bit of advice yesterday in Care of Magical Creatures, and the stupid sod went completely postal. He threw a sodding clabbert at me. Does anyone else realise the danger in that? Who knows what the thing could have done to me?! Yet another of the many daily threats on my life.
Then, this ugly pustule in the middle of the clabbert's head started flashing red, and it attacked me. Of course, everyone thought this was all very hilarious, as they're morons. Who knows what bacteria a clabbert could be carrying? I had to use the entire bottle of Italian wizifoam Mother sent me, and I had to burn my bloody robes. Fortunately, Father sent me new robes last week, but new robes do not repair the damage done. The Weasel is going to pay for this. Oh, yes. I will find out what he fears the most, and he will receive his comeuppance immediately.
I don't know what possessed him to throw that beast at me, but I demand he gets more than a detention for this. Please. Students get detention for being late to class. Surely his punishment for THREATENING another student's LIFE should be worse than this. And, of course, Lupin did nothing about it.
This is the second time I've been attacked by a beast in Care of Magical Creatures, and I demand something be done about this. Surely we can't be expected to take a course in which our lives are threatened. Honestly, they may as well have us being taught by werewolves. Oh, wait a moment.
I've ordered a new cauldron from Call Draunamakers, and though it's a standard pewter cauldron, I feel it's infinitely spectacular in comparison to the dull cauldrons everyone else is carrying. It comes with a Weightless Charm, also, so I certainly won't be bogged down from carrying it to Potions. Some of you are starting to get hunchbacks.
For some bloody reason, I found a mooncake waiting on my pillow for me when I went to bed last night. Correct me if I'm mistaken, but the Lantern Festival was nearly two weeks ago. Naturally, I assumed it was from an admirer. However, it seems the house-elves have struck again. The note inside said, "yu ar ded!!!" I suppose this was in response to the note I slipped into the kitchens listing their crimes against me. Ah, the joy of a good debate.
Oh, wonderful. Potter and the Weasel have just come into the classroom, and it looks like - yes, they're sitting next to me. There are at least four other seats open in the room, and yet, they chose to sit next to me. Now Weasley is trying to read over my shoulder. Yes, that's right, Weasel, you can't read it when I've got a charm on it. Ha ha ha. What a moron. If he gets any closer he's going to leave nose prints on my screen.
Potter is being rather snooty today. He just glared at me and turned his monitor to face the complete opposite direction. As though I really want to read what he's saying anyway. What could he possibly have to say that's so important? It's not like I'm not going to read it later. Well, actually, of course I won't, but it's not as though I won't have the option. What another moron.
Comments:
| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 10:07 am UTC |
I'm NOT bloody trying to read over your shoulder but if you have to charm your screen, OBVIOUSLY you have something to hide, Poo Face!
| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 10:14 am UTC |
Right, Weasel, then what were you trying to do? Smell my hair? Perhaps trying to get some tips on growing some real hair instead of that charm gone wrong growing out of yours?
And if I'm trying to hide something, what's Potter doing over there, eh?
| just_harry @ 2002-08-14 10:18 am UTC |
I'm updating my journal, Malfoy, the same as anyone else. Why do you care what I'm doing?
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 10:24 am UTC |
I don't give a sod what you do, Potter. I'm just illustrating my point. Nice monitor, by the way. Did you get it from the lake?
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 10:30 am UTC |
What the- WHY the sod did you change Harry's screen into a toad for?!
Did you get a computer mouse with whiskers to match your ferret self, Malfoy? How cute! Ha!
| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 10:39 am UTC |
You stupid prat!! Take those whiskers off my mouse right now, or I'll hex you!
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 10:41 am UTC |
CHANGE MY HANDS BACK TO SKIN COLOUR RIGHT THIS INSTANT OR YOUR COMPUTER SCREEN WILL HAVE WHISKERS TOO, YOU IMMATURE SOD OF SODS!
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 10:21 am UTC |
Harry is turning his screen away from you so he won't have to see your stupid face AND because you STALK, idiot!
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 10:23 am UTC |
In case you'd forgotten, you two are the ones who sat next to me. There are plenty of other seats. And yet, here you are.
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 10:27 am UTC |
It's nearest to the door and Harry is tired, you SHUT UP!
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 10:41 am UTC |
Oh, does Potter need to sit close to doors now so his poor ickle feet don't hurt from walking? Perhaps he can just arrange for someone to carry him. I'm sure you'd be more than happy to be obliged.
Your hands are looking better than usual today, by the way.
| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 10:43 am UTC |
We've been degnoming the whole day THANKS TO YOU and you'd have known if you didn't go and DESTROY Harry's entry, ASS! CHANGE MY HANDS BACK! NOW!
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 10:46 am UTC |
No. You put whiskers on my mouse. I'm not changing your hands back until you take them off. And what do I care if you've been degnoming or not? Really.
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 10:50 am UTC |
You bloody well should, since YOU are the one who got me into detention for NO RHYME OR REASON, CRYBABY!
YOU TURNED MY HANDS GREEN FIRST, IDIOT IDIOT IDIOT!
| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 10:52 am UTC |
NO. YOU PUT WHISKERS ON MY MOUSE FIRST. WHY DO YOU THINK I TURNED THEM GREEN IN THE FIRTS PLACE? Do brains cost money these days? That would explain why you have none.
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 10:55 am UTC |
YOU TURNED HARRY'S COMPUTER INTO A FROG!! Invest in some memory, why don't you!!
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 10:59 am UTC |
Oh, so now Potter can't even be bothered to stand up for himself, eh? Has to have his minions do it? Charming.
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 11:02 am UTC |
Harry is just too nice to turn your shoes into pink bunny slippers but I'm not, ha ha ha.
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 10:53 am UTC |
And what do you mean, no rhyme or reason? You THREW an ANIMAL at me. It's your own bloody fault.
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2002-08-14 10:56 am UTC |
You insulted me and Ginny! Why do I have to keep reminding you of your stupid deeds?!
(parent)| just_harry @ 2002-08-14 11:01 am UTC |
It's not like I wanted to sit next to you, either, Malfoy.
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2002-08-14 01:02 pm UTC |
You sat here. There are plenty of other seats. Of course, perhaps you just wanted to attempt to copy my work, since you're failing all of your lessons.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2002-08-14 01:00 pm UTC |
Mr Malfoy, far be it from me to suggest that you actually pay attention to my class, but if you had you would know that the Clabbert carries a Ministry classification of XX, which is defined as "harmless and may be domesticated." Thus, you were hardly in any danger, particular in an environment were someone - myself - would have easily stepped in and taken care of the situation were you in any sort of peril. Being groped by a Clabbert does not an "attack" make. Especially when the animal in question is no bigger than Mr Longbottom's erstwhile toad.
Also, had you not attempted to chuck the poor creature across the room, I doubt he would have felt it necessary to relieve himself upon your person.
I'm beginning to think that perhaps I've been a bit lax with you, as far as your education is concerned, if you do not know the basic facts about such a simple creature. In that case, I want two feet of parchment from you on the care and handling of the Clabbert, as well as the pros and cons of their domestication. And please refrain from plagiarising the text book, this time. The original author did a fine job the first time around. Please have it to me by Friday.
Oh, and one more thing, Mr Malfoy...
...do I smell lilacs?
