blondenarcissa @ 2002-11-12 19:35:00

Current mood: enraged
Current music:Jealousy - Liz PhairPhoenix

I cannot BELIEVE the audacity of my husband at times! All week long he had suggested to me that this weekend I ought to "apparate to Cairo and spend as many galleons as you want on the new crop of silk gowns being shown" in that groundbreakingly fabulous Adamite Sui fashion showing going on there. Why, I should have known that he was up to something! Either Fake Lucius has come back and done something to my darling husband or my darling husband has turned into the evil Fake Lucius of summer holiday infamy. Oh, Zeus's Lighting Rod, I cannot bear to be around Lucius now. He has betrayed me in a most grievous manner.

I suppose I have Remus to thank for bringing Lucius's debauchery and lies to light. Remus was ever so kind enough to gift me with a family heirloom - a simply lovely small pewter and jade serpentine brooch that belonged to his grandmother. He told me that it was charmed to give me notice if anyone around me was being less than truthful. Why, the charm certainly did work!

As I was all prepared to aparate off to Cairo for a fabulous weekend of shopping, sun, and various rare African liquores, I had dropped by Lucius's chambers to give him notice of my leave. As I always begin my weekend travels on Saturday evening and return to the Manor on a Wednesday, it is customary to drop by for a lengthy farewell session before I leave. To my surprise, Lucius barely cracked his door open and appeared out of breath, red faced, sweaty and most displeased to see me. Concerned, I of course inquired as to his health. He merely gave me a mumbled response and promptly bade me farewell before essentially SLAMMING the door on my face. Needless to say, the lovely serpentine brooch began to slither about and hiss, indicating that my husband was being untruthful with me.

I do not know what he was up to that day but, rest assured, I know he was not ill. It did not sound as if he was alone in his chambers either, come to think of it.

I shall have my revenge on Fake Lucius or WHICHEVER Lucius this is if it is the last thing I do.

I suddenly have the urge to learn more curses, hexes, and defence spells. After all, if something did happen to my husband, I need to be certain that I can properly defend myself against the evil entity sharing my home. Naturally I shall need an experienced teacher.

Comments:

lupercus @ 2002-11-14 11:07 pm UTC

Narcissa -

If you're in need of a tutor in the basic hexes and curses, and perhaps some not-so-basics, I'd be happy to oblige.

Owl me.

- Remus Lupin

blondenarcissa @ 2002-11-15 04:42 am UTC

Remus:

I would be very grateful for your instruction. An owl shall be along shortly to provide you with a proper time and meeting place.

~Narcissa Malfoy

(parent)
purestblood @ 2002-11-15 11:15 pm UTC

Narcissa,

Always the one to leap to conclusions. I was exercising, my dear. I've found that my pants are just the tiniest bit tight around the waist and I wished to rectify the situation, my darling. Nothing more. Exercise. I was simply too embarrassed to tell you.

Now. Do have fun in Cairo, and think of me fondly under the Arabian nights. Is it safe for me to assume the werewolf will not be accompanying you?

Lucius

blondenarcissa @ 2002-11-16 07:45 am UTC

Lucius (or shall I say, FAKE Lucius?!?!):

Ah, yes. How daft of me! You were "exercising". Exercising reeking of absinthe and most certainly (from what I could tell as the door was barely cracked open) not attired in exercising apparel. And what can you tell me of the dim mood lighting? Exercising my Vivienne Westwitch-booted FOOT.

Stay far away from me, Fake Lucius. Until you return my darling husband and leave my home, I shall be on guard for the likes of you. I may be a delicate, well-bred Lady of the Manor but I shall harbor no qualms about hexing you should you happen about my path.

Narcissa

(parent)
blondenarcissa @ 2002-11-16 07:47 am UTC

P.S. It is NONE of your business, you imposter, as to whether or not I had the pleasure of certain companies whilst on my miniholiday.

(parent)
purestblood @ 2002-11-17 01:46 am UTC

I shall arrange for another vacation at St. Mungo's, effective immediately. I had so hoped we'd gotten this problem under control.

Lucius

(parent)
blondenarcissa @ 2002-11-17 05:18 am UTC

You shall be doing NO such thing! There is no problem with me if that is what you are implying! The only problem about the Manor is that YOU SEEM TO HAVE DONE SOMETHING WITH MY HUSBAND. Give me back my husband restored to his original self, you self-serving, condescending man. Merlin knows just who you true identity could be. Why, you could even be a Mudblood disguising yourself as my darling husband.

Oh Gods. Yes, that must be it.

GET OUT OF MY HOUSE YOU FILTHY MUDBLOOD. STOP TAINTING MY AIR AND POLLUTING MY HOME WITH YOUR PRESENCE.

~Narcissa Malfoy

(parent)
purestblood @ 2002-11-17 10:12 pm UTC
Re:

This behavior will cease immediately. Let you doubt the sincerity of my sentiment, I assure you I am quite determined. Either you will cease this behavior or you will go to St. Mungo's. I will not hesitate to have you committed for as long as it takes to ensure that you stop this immediately. I am your husband, and always have been, but I will not tolerate these games. If you do not stop, I will see to it that you are stopped. Your choice, my dear.

Lucius

(parent)
blondenarcissa @ 2002-11-18 10:35 am UTC

The only behavior that is in need of ceasing is your own. If anyone in this household is to be committed it is YOU. Your audacity to claim that you are my husband is truly astounding. I do NOT know who you are, sir, but I DO know that you are NOT my husband. My husband would never slam a door in my face no matter what the circumstances may be.

My brooch alerted me to your untrustworthy behavior that day. If you are so adamant in your claims to be my husband, kindly explain to me just WHAT you were doing. The exercising, my darling, is simply not believable.

~Narcissa

(parent)
jadedsirius @ 2002-11-17 09:56 pm UTC

Many things become more clear now. My sympathies, Lucius.

And may I say that you do not look in need of exercise to me.

~Sirius

(parent)
purestblood @ 2002-11-17 11:27 pm UTC

Thank you, Sirius.

I was in Amalfi a few days ago and spotted a leather jacket. I'm taking the liberty of having it sent to you. Please advise if the color or fit is in any way unsatisfactory.

Lucius

(parent)
jadedsirius @ 2002-11-18 06:06 am UTC

It's perfect, actually, Lucius. Thank you for thinking of me.

It goes perfectly with my leather trousers. I'd be glad to show you this weekend...

~Sirius

(parent)