blondenarcissa in nocturne_alley @ 2003-06-19 09:11:00

Current mood:

tired

I do appreciate that Lucius has been giving me my space during this trying time. Still at the Chalet in Switzerland, I am trying my best to come to terms with everything that has happened to me over the past few weeks. Some days are better than others and I am pleased to report that today is a 'good' day. I have only taken to crying thrice this morning which is quite an improvement over yesterday when I had taken to fits of sobbing nearly every quarter hour. Echo seems calmer today as well. I believe ths is empathetic which is simply darling of her.

I am beginning to rethink the drastic hair colour. Because I had been so very ashamed at believing myself to be of unpure blood, I had remained inside the Chalet in order to sequester myself from society. I thought that everyone would look at me in a most apalling manner and I could not bear to endure that one bit. When Draco had become injured in his match the other week I tried to contact him a few days after the horrid firechat incident. He didn't respond to my post (which I now learn that the poor dear felt too incapacitated to properly write his mother) and I had even thought he banned me from commenting in his journaling project. Since I was under the impression that my own son wanted nothing to do with me, I was naturally torn as to what to do when the time came for his big match against the Gryffindor house. I am very proud of my Little Dragon and wanted to see him play but at the same time I did not wish for anyone to recognize me. Therefore, I came to the conclusion that charming my hair to be of another style and colour would be best. Outfitting myself in rather fashionable haute couture Mugglewear, I did attend the Quidditch match. (I went to Hogwarts in the morning only to find that there was a rather large Muggle object obstructing the pitch and returned to my Chalet to discover that I had had a visit from Aunt Mallory and she had used my journal. I did not have time at that moment to peruse what she had written as Echo demanded attention and then I was off on a few errands before returning to Hogwarts for the game later that evening.) Lucius was there that night and he recognized me right off. I was ever so mortified to be noticed and was unsure of what to do. My husband assured me that everything would be fine, presented me with a lovely shiny bauble, kissed me on the cheek, and gave me leave when he realized that I needed to be alone.

Imagine my surprise when I finally return to my Chalet that evening and thoroughly read Aunt Mallory's entry.

I am so very relieved and feel incredibly foolish at the same time. Perhaps in a few days I shall feel well enough to return to the Manor but for now I simply need to recooperate from all the emotional trauma that has befallen me.

Draco, darling, have you received that book that I owled you?

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