| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 00:01:00 |
| Current mood: | enraged |
ATTENTION, WORLD.
WEASLEY HAS REMOVED HIS HAND. HE JUST WAVED AT ME FROM ACROSS THE LIBRARY AND THERE WAS ONLY A STUMP. HE REMOVED HIS HAND AND OWLED IT TO MADAM POMFREY. TO 'FIX' IT. THERE IS NO LONGER A HAND. WHY? BECAUSE ONE OF HIS HANDS IS LONGER THAN THE OTHER. HE DETACHED HIS HAND FOR REPAIRS.
Comments:
| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 05:09 am UTC |
I THOUGHT IT WAS A JOKE. I HARDLY EXPECTED A STUMP TO COME OUT OF THE STACKS. YOU REMOVED YOUR OWN HAND.
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2004-06-11 05:10 am UTC |
That's what I've been telling you, haven't I?? Why are you shouting, bloody hell. You've all gone mental!! Do you think my thighs are big?
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 05:13 am UTC |
HOW LONG HAVE YOU BEEN SITTING HANDLESS IN THE LIBRARY, WEASLEY?
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2004-06-11 05:15 am UTC |
About an hour?? You didn't answer my question you screaming sod
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2004-06-11 05:18 am UTC |
What should I have said?? It's hardly anything to announce! I wasn't in pain!!
(parent)| jadedsirius @ 2004-06-11 05:21 am UTC |
Ron, what were you THINKING? Your mother is going to have a heart attack.
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2004-06-11 05:22 am UTC |
Sirius! Your godson said I have big and small hands! What else was I suppose to do!
(parent)| jadedsirius @ 2004-06-11 05:25 am UTC |
Jesus, Ron, he was joking. He was trying to bait Malfoy, not give you a complex!
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2004-06-11 05:27 am UTC |
No! Professor Lupin was right! I checked too, it must be cool to have wolf eyes, he sees better than most I think
(parent)| jadedsirius @ 2004-06-11 05:41 am UTC |
If you were that upset, Ron, why didn't you just go to the hospital wing with your hand attached?
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2004-06-11 05:43 am UTC |
I was going to! But I had a lot of comments to reply to!
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 05:14 am UTC |
I've never really looked at your thighs, Weasley, but I've not noticed them to be disproportionate to your giant feet.
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2004-06-11 05:17 am UTC |
So they are smaller than my feet you mean?? Then it's okay!
(parent)| knight_to_h3 @ 2004-06-11 05:38 am UTC |
Wasn't that what you said?? I have to go get my hand back I think
(parent)| deanthomas @ 2004-06-11 06:12 am UTC |
Ron! This is the most brilliant thing I have ever heard of and I can't believe I missed it.
I feel out artisted now.
| seamus_f @ 2004-06-11 02:11 pm UTC |
Well, at least you missed it for a good reason.
And hello, now I have to deal with Pomfrey, who is not going to be in a good mood about this one.
| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 05:10 am UTC |
THERE'S A WRIST AND SUDDENLY NOTHING, POTTER. HE'S REMOVED HIS HAND. NOW ONE ARM IS AN ENTIRE HAND LONGER THAN THE OTHER.
(parent)| just_harry @ 2004-06-11 05:28 am UTC |
YOU'RE THE ONE WHO WENT ON ABOUT HIS GROSS ASYMMETRICAL HANDS!
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 05:34 am UTC |
I? You'll note that I haven't said a word about it since I noticed.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:08 am UTC |
I was joking. His hands are fine. Or they were, but now he
good God, can that woman scream.
| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 05:12 am UTC |
ACTUALLY, THERE WAS AT LEAST A CENTIMETRE'S DIFFERENCE, I NOTICED IT YEARS AGO. I ASSUMED HE KNEW. IT WAS HIDEOUS, BUT A STUMP IS HARDLY A SUITABLE REPLACEMENT.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:15 am UTC |
Oh, come now. Surely the girth of his thighs outweighed his misshapen hands.
For example, I hardly notice how your eyes are uneven by a hair's breadth, thanks to your receding hairline.
| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 05:18 am UTC |
Actually, I have the distance between my eyes measured each time I get fitted for robes, as well as my forehead. A nice attempt at getting me to remove my eyes, though, terribly witty.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:36 am UTC |
Well, if you pay someone enough they will of course tell you what you want to hear.
You must have a very unique view of the world. Slightly lopsided at best?
| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 05:38 am UTC |
I somehow doubt you can see my face for all the scars on yours. It's quite professional of you to try to encourage me to remove my eyes, though. Yes, this does make me feel quite safe in your presence.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:40 am UTC |
I wear my scars proudly, Draco. You, however, frighten first-years and small animals with your hideous disfigurement.
(parent)| potterstinks @ 2004-06-11 05:43 am UTC |
I imagine you'd think Professor Snape was a fine, noble man for saying these things to Potter, wouldn't you? Do go on about how horribly disfigured and ugly one of your students is.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:45 am UTC |
Don't mind if I do! Seeing as how you are no longer my student, and all.
Is that your original nose? You should ask for a refund.
| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:51 am UTC |
I really don't know, to be honest. It started because he was being sort of a prat about Ron's hands, because I was clearly joking about them, and they are not actually differently-sized, but now I'm just being sort of a bastard.
If you want me to stop, Harry, I'll stop. I can pick on Padfoot and get my jollies that way, instead.
I'll even apologise, if you like.
| just_harry @ 2004-06-11 05:57 am UTC |
That's pretty much what Ron and Malfoy do. But they've been doing it since first year. And I guess he's freaked out by asymmetry, which is kind of weird. But yeah. I wish you would.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 06:04 am UTC |
It is very weird. But not uncommon. I am rather disturbed by hairy toes, but we won't go into that.
All right.
Draco Malfoy, I apologise for insulting you.
You'd think I'd know better now not to joke about anything anymore!
| petitemillicent @ 2004-06-11 05:45 am UTC |
Wow.
Wearing flaws proudly make them less of a flaw now, I see.
M. B.
| petitemillicent @ 2004-06-11 05:54 am UTC |
No, actually.
It does not.
Being proud of the fact that you are behaving like a 5 year old to Draco does not make you 5 and a half.
In fact it makes you 3.
M. B.
| petitemillicent @ 2004-06-11 05:59 am UTC |
I already have an animal friend.
But thanks for the offer.
M. B.
| jadedsirius @ 2004-06-11 05:22 am UTC |
Remus, I've owled Molly Weasley -- probably best she hears it from us before she finds it on these blasted journals.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:23 am UTC |
Merlin, she's going to have my head.
It was a joke! I didn't think he'd actually
But then again, it IS Ron Weasley.
Oh hell, Sirius. He's got no hand!
| jadedsirius @ 2004-06-11 05:26 am UTC |
Let's just be thankful you didn't tell him he had a big head.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:27 am UTC |
True.
His head IS big, isn't it? Big like some... big-headed thing.
| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:37 am UTC |
I frighten even myself, Padfoot.
Stop me, before I take over the world. Or acquire a tacky snake cane.
| jadedsirius @ 2004-06-11 05:40 am UTC |
You'll soon have the Hufflepuffs removing their eyes and exchanging them for better colours.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:43 am UTC |
Well, badger see, badger do.
You speak as though you are innocent on all charges. Or need I remind you of what you did to the Ravenclaw, fourth year?
| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 05:53 am UTC |
Ah, Frivolous. Mad bastard, that one. Somehow convinced the Ravenclaw that they were allergic to books.
Really quite sad, actually. I've never seen so many children cry.
Frivolous ought to be ashamed of himself.
| jadedsirius @ 2004-06-11 06:02 am UTC |
Well, they were such easy targets. For Frivolous. At least it wasn't N.E.W.T.s time.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 06:07 am UTC |
Right, for Frivolous.
That Frivolous.
I fancied him, you know. Quite a bit, for ages.
| jadedsirius @ 2004-06-11 06:19 am UTC |
Well, he did have a nice body, I'll grant you that. I can see the attraction. I will admit that I myself contemplated the idea of an affair, but something about it just seemed tacky.
(parent)| lupercus @ 2004-06-11 06:31 am UTC |
...
I have no response for that.
Wow, Sirius.
I'll be right back. I have to... think on this one, for a bit.