purestblood: That Sodding Mooncake Festival

That Sodding Mooncake Festival
While I was gathering my thoughts, pursuant to making this journal entry, one thing came to mind quite forcefully: Hogwarts is rapidly going downhill. It is not the same school that I attended. I am considering withdrawing my financial support. The continuing mistreatment of my son cannot be allowed to continue. He is a Malfoy, and must be treated with the respect and deference that is his due. It is the natural order of things, although I'm sure that some would disagree.

At the festival, who should I run into but

la_pensee. She's certainly brave enough when surrounded by a crowd of people. It appears that only when she is required to appear on her own that she turns tail and runs off to London. I can now sleep easily at nights, knowing that. The girl is most ill-mannered. For some reason, Severus relented and allowed the girl to come to the festival. I assume the snails they were feeding her in France weren't satisfying her. Nevertheless, I soldiered on with the good grace that is a hallmark of all Malfoys. I appeared at the festival, lantern in hand, and despite what

scotchtartan might think, it was perfectly acceptable. I instructed the house-elves to decorate it in the style of Mondrian, and I confess to being quite pleased with the results. Perhaps if I had coated it with catnip it might have met her qualifications.

I, of course, brought a mooncake as well, bearing a cryptic note: "Meet me in the broom closet." I confess to a passing nostalgia at times for my school days. However, as a further indication of the moral turpitude running rampant at Hogwarts, mine read: "Make me feel like a woman, you hot-blooded wizard, you." My thoughts upon receiving this note are unprintable. And, lest anyone ask, Narcissa was unable to attend the festival. Her therapist feels it is best if she avoid groups of people for some time until the medication begins to work.

Draco left me, no doubt to avoid the pawings of the aforementioned Miss Parkinson, so I wandered a bit until I ran into none other than

jadedsirius. I reached into my pockets, but, alas, no chew toys were present. I attempted to make conversation with the man, reminiscing about the past, when he became quite unhinged and swung at me! It appears that Lupin is not the only one adversely affected by the full moon. I defended myself, of course, and

potions_master arrived with all due dispatch. He took me to his rooms and administered a few potions, attending to my wounds. Black, I'm sure, just crawled off into the Forest to lick his. Severus certainly does have the touch, I must say. He really is quite the mediwizard. A hot bath soon set all to rights, and he can do the most amazing things with bath salts and a loofah. Extraordinary. I spent a most cordial night with Severus, recuperating under his expert care.

I left the next morning. I opened the door to exit Severus' chambers.

I tripped over the body of a dead Niffler.

I can only assume that the quality of food has gotten to be so poor at Hogwarts that distinguished professors are now forced to forgage for their meals. Or perhaps it was a peace offering from Black.

What James Potter ever saw in Sirius Black is simply beyond me. I'm sure Sirius only tolerates

just_harry because of his startling resemblance to his father, right down to the messy hair and lack of pride in his personal appearance.

I must go draft a letter to the Board of Governors now.

jadedsirius @ 2002-08-05 10:22 pm UTC

Malfoy:

I am sick and tired of your insinuations. Your behaviour last night was beyond rude and your suppositions infuriating. You deserved it, and I only regret that we were pulled apart before I could wipe the smirk off your inbred face.

~Sirius

purestblood @ 2002-08-05 11:10 pm UTC

Black:

What, pray tell, am I insinuating? I do believe you took the first swing. That is not an insinuation. That is a fact. Perhaps your time in Azkaban disabused of that notion but, rest assured, it is not so.

Go brush Lupin.

(parent)

jadedsirius @ 2002-08-05 11:35 pm UTC

I am referring of course to the cryptic comments you kept making about my forgetting something. You are truly annoying.

Go abuse a house-elf.

~Sirius

(parent)

purestblood @ 2002-08-06 01:58 pm UTC

Well, if you don't remember, then far be it for me to remind you of events you'd rather not recall. I had merely tried to remind you of events, the memory of which might keep you warm on those cold nights with the moon is full and Remus is on the prowl.

Go brush Potter's hair.

Lucius

(parent)

jadedsirius @ 2002-08-06 02:05 pm UTC

I recall everything perfectly. I recall that you've never been anything other than an annoying, pretentious git.

Go avoid your desperately clingy wife.

~Sirius

(parent)

purestblood @ 2002-08-06 11:19 pm UTC

Well, Black, if that's all you remember, more's the pity.
For the record, my wife is not clingy. She adores me and cannot stand to be without my company.

Go practice chess. I see you haven't gotten any better since we were in school.

Lucius

(parent)

jadedsirius @ 2002-08-06 11:53 pm UTC

You're becoming repetitious, Malfoy. Just tell me what you're hinting at.

And that bit of information about your wife just tells me that she's as mentally unbalanced as she always was.

Ask Snape how good I am at chess.

~Sirius

(parent)

purestblood @ 2002-08-07 07:26 pm UTC

What am I hinting at? See if this doesn't trigger a memory: Forbidden Forest, sixth year, truth or dare, and a pint of firewhiskey.

Did you ever find your shirt after that, by the way? I've always wondered.

Lucius

(parent)

jadedsirius @ 2002-08-08 01:11 pm UTC

I think I know what you are implying, Malfoy. Now I know that you are certifiably insane. I would never sleep with a Death Eater.

~Sirius

(parent)

purestblood @ 2002-08-08 04:29 pm UTC

Of course you wouldn't. I would never sleep with a felon. However, in school, we were nothing more than students. I wasn't a Death Eater then, nor were you a convict.

Lucius

(parent)

scotchtartan @ 2002-08-06 12:34 pm UTC

Mister Malfoy, I did not state your lantern was not pleasing to the eye, just that it was unlikely you worked hard on it. My opinion has not changed.

~M.McGonagall

purestblood @ 2002-08-06 02:01 pm UTC

Professor,

On the contrary. I put a lot of thought into the design of my lantern, and personally oversaw each step in the creation of said lantern. House-elves really are hopeless at following instructions. You have supervise them constantly. I sacrificed my free time in the making of my lantern.

The offer of catnip still stands.

Lucius Malfoy

(parent)

scotchtartan @ 2002-08-06 04:06 pm UTC

Promises, promises, Mister Malfoy.

For your records, I prefer the native Vietnamese nepeta cataria to the English, which is commonly of hothouse cultivation.

Do give Mrs. Malfoy a nod from me. She was a lovely girl as I recall, and I'm saddened to have read of her recent troubles.

~M.McGonagall

(parent)

purestblood @ 2002-08-06 11:22 pm UTC

Professor,

I am sending you some freshly picked nepeta cataria from a small field just northeast of Ho Chi Minh City. I hope it meets with your exacting standards.

I will convey your good wishes to Narcissa. I am sure she will be thankful for the sentiment.

Lucius Malfoy

(parent)

Current mood:	irritated
Current music:	House-elves whimpering