| turpinol @ 2004-05-18 18:04:00 |
| Current mood: |  busy |
| Current music: | The Octoberists - I Was Meant for the Pitch |
I realise I have no nasty subject line or opening sentence.
Last night I dreamt not only that I had a sword, but that I ripped a giant gash into Morgan Mullarkey's chest with it. It was Hanukkah and I was at home, and my dad gave me a new sword for Hanukkah. I have never owned a sword in my life, but I remember very clearly that it was a new sword. I think I collected them. I started waving it around, even though I was surrounded by people, and I accidentally cut Morgan right across the chest. He didn't even seem to notice, though. He thought the blood was jam, which was weird. I was really quite seriously embarrassed.
I'm in a bit of a panic right now. The thing is, I don't know what I want to be when I leave Hogwarts, and I'm sort of running out of time. Everyone else seems to know. I have no idea. It makes me feel completely stupid. I really ought to know by now. If it hasn't occurred to me by now, why would I decide within the next month? In fifth year I wanted to be a professor, so I aimed for my O.W.L.s with that in mind, but I don't think that's what I want to be anymore. I haven't for awhile. Daphne Greengrass wants to be an author, and Padma Patil obviously wants to do something with art, and Seamus Finnigan is going to be a Healer, and Neville Longbottom has multiple things to choose from, and Pansy Parkinson wants to work in the Ministry, and I don't want to do anything. I am feeling very inept and horrified at the moment.
Uh. Sorry. I just feel like I am behind everyone else. Professor Flitwick always treats me like I've got everything figured out, like I'm ahead of the 'game' (whatever the game is). He acts like I am ten times cleverer than people who wait to figure out what they want to do, and I don't know where he even got that impression.
My brain is absolutely fried right now. I am going to have to take a draught to make sure I stay awake tonight to revise, and I just had one last night and now I cannot remember who Arma the Artistic was or why I have her name written on my hand.
Comments:
| seamus_f @ 2004-05-19 04:19 am UTC |
You can't include me. I've always known. I knew when I was tiny. So I am clearly completely mad and do not count.
Anyway, don't panic. It doesn't look good on you.
| wheresmytoad @ 2004-05-19 04:59 pm UTC |
Having multiple things to choose from isn't any easier, believe me.
And I still have to pass N.E.W.T.s.
I think we're all getting fried.
| turpinol @ 2004-05-19 05:26 pm UTC |
Well, at least you just have the two, instead of thousands. That's got to be of some help. I suppose the cauldron always looks blacker from the other side.
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